Episode #173: The 12 Week 12 months

This week, we’re doing a deep dive into a subject that we’ve referenced many occasions on this present—the guide The 12 Week Year. So if you’re within the temper to speak about purpose setting, then this episode is for you!

Plus, we’re going to discuss in regards to the High Five Test.

You could find the podcast posts archive right here.

A giant thanks to our sponsors! Try the presents from Modern Fertility, Bubs Naturals, Jenni Kayne, and Caraway.

And, in case you’re searching for a particular code you heard on the podcast, you may see a full record on this web page!

Present Notes

Why a 12-week purpose is healthier:

-Lengthy deadlines can really feel very daunting and result in procrastination.

-You possibly can break up your objectives into seasons so that you do extra work on them when you’ve got extra time and fewer when you’re busier.

The vital components of the 12-week yr:

-Making your imaginative and prescient (ensure it’s clear and measurable).

-Develop your plan (break up your purpose right into a collection of small objectives).

-Accountability and maintaining rating

-Checking in

Check out high5test.com

Elsie’s high 5 strengths:

-Catalyst
-Optimist
-Philomath
-Thinker
-Timekeeper

Emma’s high 5 strengths:

-Philomath
-Timekeeper
-Focus Skilled
-Deliverer
-Thinker

Miss an Episode? Get Caught Up!

Episode 173 Transcript:

Emma: You’re listening to The Lovely Mess Podcast, your cozy consolation pay attention. This week we’re doing one other deep dive into a subject that we’ve referenced many occasions on this present. It’s the guide, the 12 Week 12 months. So in case you’re within the temper to speak about purpose setting, this episode is for you. And we’re additionally gonna discuss just a little bit in regards to the Excessive 5 check, which we’re gonna speak about our outcomes, Elsie’s outcomes, my outcomes, and how one can take the check in case you’re . 

Elsie: I’ll clarify the general idea of the 12 Week 12 months. So the 12 week yr is a purpose setting technique that goes by quarter. So 12 weeks is one quarter, proper? 

Emma: Yeah, it’s three months. 

Elsie: Yeah. So 12 weeks is each three months. The factor I really like about that is whenever you set your objectives only for the brand new yr, the start of every yr. To start with, it may be like a procrastination factor the place you don’t have a brilliant stable January, that type of occurs to me yearly. You’re like, I didn’t actually obtain my purpose in January, so I assume I’m simply not going to have an ideal yr this yr.

Emma: So I assume I’ll simply wait, surrender for subsequent January.

Elsie: Proper. So whenever you do it each three months, you simply have 4 occasions the contemporary begins, 4 occasions extra contemporary begins than you do annually, which I really like. And the opposite factor is that almost all objectives that you just need to obtain in a yr, you really might obtain or make main headway in simply three months. You don’t actually need a yr for many objectives, and even in case you do want a yr, you may not less than do one a part of your purpose then do the subsequent half. Part them off in your subsequent quarter? I feel that the twelfth week yr was actually, actually useful for me, it’s only a mindset shift. And I really like New 12 months’s objectives personally. I’m not a kind of individuals who’s like, I’m not a decision individual. I’m positively a decision individual. I’ll all the time take an opportunity to set a purpose. . However I feel that that is simply extra sensible and it really works higher. And the opposite factor that they do lots within the 12 week yr is behavior monitoring. So there’s a variety of journaling and a variety of like monitoring of your progress. And that’s one thing that works actually good for my persona as a result of I type of just a little little bit of a perfectionist factor the place if I don’t do one thing day-after-day, then I really feel like that I’ve already failed. And with the ability to see that doing one thing three to 5 occasions per week is in some methods higher as a result of it’s like attainable as an alternative of unattainable, and it’s simply pretty much as good as doing one thing day-after-day. I feel that having requirements that you may by no means obtain might be one of many greatest enemies of success that many people have. Yeah, I discovered the guide. Should you haven’t learn it, I’d positively suggest it, however you may in all probability additionally simply hearken to this episode and take like the principle excessive factors from it as a result of it’s fairly easy.

Emma: Yeah, it’s fairly easy. And it’s not a protracted guide too. So the 12 week yr has like an internet site the place you can too join a publication and I’ve signed up for it years and years in the past. It’s type of a kind of newsletters the place they’ll ship like suggestions and methods right here and there or type of like check-ins, issues like that. So anyway, I prefer it. If I don’t have time, I don’t learn ’em. But when I’ve time and I do learn them, I normally discover them like useful. So anyway, when you have any curiosity in that, simply so you understand that’s accessible, it’s free. Okay. So I used to be simply gonna go forward and go over a couple of issues which can be type of just like the case for a brief deadline , as a result of that’s just about it. Is the 12 week years like, Hey, let’s have shorter deadlines as an alternative of this yr lengthy deadline. Sure, and I feel so many of those you type of already hit on along with your synopsis of the 12 week yr, and I feel that’s type of attention-grabbing. So I’ll undergo these type of shortly, however be happy to elaborate if you wish to, however yeah. Okay, so lengthy deadlines can actually simply result in a variety of procrastination. If you understand you’ve got an entire yr to do one thing and perhaps you don’t actually need a yr to do it, then you definitely’ll find yourself procrastinating. So you find yourself being like, oh, I’ll get to it, after which come October you’re like, oh crap, I higher actually work on this purpose as a result of I’m throughout the yr and you would have simply executed it shortly after which moved on to your subsequent factor. Additionally, I feel lengthy deadlines can typically imply that our priorities or our life actually modifications, and I don’t learn about you, however that’s the place I get actually hung up, is that if I’ve made a purpose after which my life actually does change and it makes extra sense for me to vary that purpose. Typically I get it in my head that I’m giving up or I failed, or I’m making an excuse to not end my purpose when the reality is that this purpose simply doesn’t serve me anymore as a result of I made it six months in the past and my life was completely different six months in the past. 

Elsie: I’ve this downside actually unhealthy, with the ability to settle for placing a pause button on objectives has been very helpful for me. Earlier than that, I actually had the mindset that if I wasn’t doing all the pieces proper now, like if somebody says, how’s your pottery going? Proper now, I haven’t made pottery for greater than a month, I’d really feel like panicked in like a failure. However now, that I’ve my pause button in place and I do know that like we’re displaying our home completely always and that’s why I can’t get my pottery stuff out as a lot as I needed to, I used to be leaving it out for months at a time. It’s simply not my productive season for that proper now and it will likely be once more sooner or later. There’s a variety of good thoughts stuff, extra mindset stuff on this guide, particularly for individuals who will be like very arduous on your self or like an all or nothing persona.

Emma: Yeah, I feel that it’s a variety of mindset modifications and actually optimistic ones usually. As a result of, yeah, there’s simply a variety of guilt that may come into purpose setting and I actually assume that isn’t useful, so discovering methods to do away with that’s actually good. Okay, so one other factor, lengthy deadlines may really feel actually daunting. So in case you actually do make a purpose that’s gonna take you a yr to perform it, it’s in all probability a very huge purpose. Until you break it down into small objectives, you’re in all probability gonna really feel overwhelmed, and which may even result in you giving up. So alongside these traces, I feel lengthy deadlines, after they’re executed efficiently, they actually simply are a collection of brief deadlines. Should you’re your purpose is, like Elsie loves pottery, I’m making an attempt to jot down a guide. So if I’m like, my purpose is to jot down a guide, it’s like, okay, effectively the first step is like define, step two, chapter one, you understand, nevertheless many chapters, it’s a collection of small objectives alongside the way in which. And so I feel the 12 week yr in some methods is simply an acknowledgement that with a purpose to accomplish one thing huge in a yr or 5 years or no matter, you’re on the deadline. You’re simply gonna have a bunch of small objectives alongside the way in which, and so that you would possibly as effectively simply consider it as, okay, effectively what’s my 12 week plan right here as a result of I obtained three months to do X, Y, Z. So this sort of ties into all of it, however I like quarterly objectives partly as a result of I feel, and I particularly assume this for our work, there’s simply completely different components of the yr. Possibly it’s as a result of I dwell someplace with the 4 Seasons, perhaps it’s as a result of I’ve a child, and so like college and daycare will be completely different at completely different occasions and there’s holidays. I don’t know. However for me, I really feel like I can actually go loopy for work in Q1 and Q2 after which Q3 and this fall there’s, there’s a variety of work, however there’s much more like household time and holidays and issues like that. And I like with the ability to type of consider issues in that approach. So then I don’t really feel unhealthy in let’s say this fall, I’m not working fairly as a lot cuz I’ve a variety of vacation stuff going if I type of knew that and I actually busted my in Q1 and q2, now I’m like, oh, I’m on monitor. You realize, my objectives in This fall aren’t as profession, they’re extra household cleansing the home, preparing for visitors, no matter, they’re extra in that vary. And I can have that 12 weeks be one thing that is smart for my yr versus this yr lengthy purpose that has to embody all these completely different seasons, and it virtually doesn’t make sence.

Elsie: I feel that in This fall for our enterprise, we type of do have to enter survival mode yearly as a result of it’s normally after we do virtually all of our advertisements, so that you don’t get to choose your content material as a lot as you do that time of yr. Yeah, I fully agree, which is like advertisements and household stuff.

Emma: Yeah. You’re like, what’s do and what’s occurring with my household? That’s all I’ve time for. You realize, it’s enjoyable, nevertheless it’s a sure season and I feel in case you’re anticipating to do a variety of deep work for the longer term, you’re simply not gonna get to do it that quarter, I by no means do. So anyway, that’s what Q1’s for. So these are type of my case for the brief deadline, so hopefully we’ve swayed you. I really feel like we in all probability did. 

Elsie: I feel everyone seems to be swayed, I positively am, I’d by no means return. I feel that it’s very compelling. There’s actually nothing that’s higher about lengthy deadlines. No, there’s actually nothing.

Emma: No. Yeah, it’s a great technique. I agree. 

Elsie: Case’s closed. 

Emma: Case’s closed, so all people’s on board, good. Okay, so then I simply needed to speak about, to me the vital components of the 12 week yr, some issues he hits on within the guide and issues that may provide help to achieve success as you’re making your objectives for the subsequent 12 weeks. Okay, so the primary one is making your imaginative and prescient. How do you resolve what to work on? How do you resolve what objectives you need? Okay, so I feel some issues that assistance is now that you understand that you’ve got 12 weeks you generally is a little extra reasonable about what you may get executed in 12 weeks. So that you’re not essentially going to be making a purpose that’s like, I’m going to learn 80 books and go to the fitness center 100 occasions or no matter.You simply know that that’s not gonna occur in 12 weeks. So now you may focus just a little extra on what’s reasonable to occur in these 12 weeks. And I’d additionally say as you’re making your imaginative and prescient, your objectives, I love to do them in a bunch of various areas. So I prefer to type of have completely different buckets of like, right here’s my private life, which incorporates like hobbies and self care. And typically additionally like well being and wellness stuff, like going to the fitness center or no matter. Then I consider household, which is usually stuff with my son, nevertheless it’s different issues too. And I type of put pals in there too, so if a pal’s having a birthday or if a pal’s going by way of a tough time, I wanna make time to be there for them or do one thing, and I take into consideration profession. So what am I making an attempt to perform these subsequent 12 weeks at work. Is there one thing that we’re constructing? Is there some type of huge deadline? Is there one thing that I’ve been wanting to begin and end? Or not less than begin, you understand, once more, you solely have 12 weeks. So what are we getting executed in these 12 weeks, that type of. So I prefer to have completely different buckets that’s how I give it some thought. However one thing that I feel is actually vital whenever you’re making objectives is to guarantee that it’s clear and measurable. I feel in case you’re like, okay, on the finish of those 12 weeks, let’s say you’re engaged on some psychological well being stuff, you’ve had a tough time and also you’re making an attempt to work on that. Not that that’s essentially me, precisely and I’m simply utilizing myself right here’s an instance, let’s simply say. So in case you make the purpose, I simply wanna really feel higher in 12 weeks. It’s like, effectively, Good purpose not precisely very clear. Not precisely very measurable but. What do you actually imply by that? And if it’s like, effectively, I wanna really feel higher, I wanna have much less days the place I’m feeling actually down. I need to really feel extra hopeful. So attempt to outline it just a little bit extra, after which take into consideration what are some issues that you would measure in that as a result of measuring a sense is actually arduous, that might be very tough. However as an alternative take into consideration like, I need to ensure I’m going to remedy each month. Okay, so then you definitely’re gonna go to remedy thrice within the subsequent 12 weeks, okay? That’s measurable. Nice, you would try this. I need to spend extra time with pals. I need to get some sunshine. I need to work on endorphin stuff. So perhaps that’s, I’m gonna do some cardio, I’m gonna go to the fitness center. I’m gonna begin working no matter factor that you just assume is gonna assist. That is your objectives, however make them measurable issues that you may really know in case you achieved it or not, in case you did it or not. As a result of whenever you get to the top of the 12 weeks, you’re gonna take inventory. You’re gonna say, oh, did I make it? Did I get all of the issues executed? And it’s not that you just’re making an attempt to make this huge to-do record and simply undergo the motions. But when issues aren’t clear and measurable, then it is likely to be actually arduous to know in case your like, in case you get to the top of the 12 weeks and also you’re like, I don’t really feel higher, then you definitely’re gonna wanna know why. So is it that you just did all of the issues and people didn’t assist and now you’ve gotta attempt one thing else? Or is it that you just didn’t do the issues, you bought sidetracked, you bought distracted, perhaps one thing occurred the place you couldn’t, one thing main modified in your life, that occurs. But when it issues aren’t clear and measurable, then it’s gonna be actually arduous to know why it labored or didn’t work. Okay, in order that’s type of about making your imaginative and prescient. Then the subsequent is when you type of have your imaginative and prescient, develop your plan. So break up your purpose right into a collection of small objectives, so issues for every month and even every week. And I feel whenever you’re enthusiastic about 12 weeks, that is a lot simpler than whenever you’re enthusiastic about an entire yr as a result of typically I’ll make a large record that’s for the entire yr. Elsie and I do that lots for weblog posts, we’re like, right here’s a thousand weblog posts I wanna write as a result of we simply get enthusiastic about concepts. So we all the time have approach too many concepts and I like to make a giant record like that. I feel it’s actually enjoyable, it makes me really feel excited. It makes me really feel like the longer term’s stuffed with potentialities. So I feel that’s a great train for these causes. Nevertheless it comes to truly executing, so this week for instance, I’m sick. So I had sooner or later the place I used to be mainly off cuz I used to be simply actually sick and couldn’t actually work. So then it’s like, okay, I’m gonna take a look at my record and I now have these 1000’s of concepts and solely 4 days to work, what might I get executed? Whereas as an alternative, in case you had these 5 issues to do that week, is there one which you’ll want to take off the record since you have been sick. You then simply get to maintain shifting ahead and it simply makes it lots quicker and simpler to observe if you understand the place you’re going after which you can also make faster changes versus this big, big grasp plan and also you get a barely off target and now you’re tremendous off target.

Elsie: Yeah, I agree. I feel it is a little little bit of a great time to say my post-it technique. Oh by the way in which, Podcast listeners attempt to diagnose me with h ADHD type of lots. I’m like, I do know that I in all probability have ADHD so lI get it. Most likely lots of people have undiagnosed ADHD. So when you have any bother with focusing, I feel the large record, like my weblog put up record for the yr of what I wanna do, it’s stapled collectively, it’s three pages of typed textual content it like it’s not one thing that I want to take a look at each week. So for me to take a look at a small record of about 5 issues, like sufficiently small to suit on a post-it is what my mind can deal with after which I can select one thing to truly work on. So I feel that in case you’re an individual who will get simply overwhelmed by a protracted record, simply don’t take a look at the lengthy record that usually. Each few weeks you may go in and decide some issues from it and preserve your self on a small record. I feel it’s only a trick you are able to do on your self that actually works. 

Emma: Sure, I agree and I feel too, it simply makes it the place all people’s busy. All of us have limitations in our life, irrespective of for what cause. And I feel that for instance, after I’m writing a guide, as soon as I’ve the define, I instantly really feel approach much less overwhelmed as a result of if I’ve two and a half to 3 hours the place I can work on this immediately, that’s all I’ve. I’m not gonna get to work on it extra perhaps this complete week,however then I take a look at my define and I’m like, oh, chapter 4 I really feel like I actually have a deal with on that. I’m gonna write that proper now, and I do it after which it’s executed. And it’s like that’s one thing that now simply moved my complete venture ahead in a significant approach. Did I end the entire guide? No, however did I write a chapter? Sure I did within the time that I’ve. And so, and that’s, , you understand, form of it’s like making an attempt to interrupt down these huge issues that we wanna do in life into smaller chew dimension issues in order that we will really get them executed. As a result of life is stuffed with numerous different issues which can be by no means gonna be on our record, however we nonetheless need to do them, and that’s simply what life’s like and it’s okay. Okay, so develop your plan and that can assist, break down your purpose into very small objectives. They are often weekly, month-to-month, they’ll even be each day. I’d say too, don’t really feel like they need to be so inflexible as a result of I feel in case you do have a really, like each single day this should occur. That doesn’t depart you a lot house for getting sick, or in case your child will get sick or you’ve got a snow day or the web goes out at your own home and you’ll’t work on the factor you have been gonna work on. It’s important to depart some margin to let life occur, otherwise you’re actually gonna stress your self out, so try this too. 

Elsie: Yeah, deal with the large wins for certain. So long as I can get this a part of my record executed, then the remainder of it’s optionally available. I feel is an effective approach to think about it. 

Emma: Okay, after which the subsequent factor I wanna speak about I feel varies a lot from individual to individual. So it’s accountability and maintaining rating. So that is one thing he talks about within the guide and there’s numerous other ways to do it. And I additionally assume it actually is determined by you and what works for you. So the entire level is to have mechanisms in place to assist preserve your self on monitor. Some individuals are very internally motivated or externally motivated, or perhaps they name it intrinsically motivated, I’m undecided. However I’m an individual the place I don’t actually need a variety of outdoors accountability. I’m very very like on the within, if I’ve determined I wanna do one thing that’s it for me, that’s sufficient. I do want methods to maintain myself on monitor. For instance, my husband, he has a pal who he all the time goes to the fitness center with. It’s not that he by no means goes to the fitness center by himself, he does, nevertheless it helps him lots to have this pal who he goes with. It’s simply form of an accountability factor. It simply implies that he is aware of his pals there. If that’s the case, if he’s not there then he’s type of letting him down or that’s in all probability too harsh of a wording, however you understand, one thing alongside these traces. Whereas me, I used to be making an attempt to get again into the fitness center this yr for my psychological well being causes, and so I used to be contemplating becoming a member of this new fitness center the place all my pals go. I went as soon as and it was actually enjoyable to see everybody. It type of dawned on me thatI’m simply not very externally motivated. I’m a really inner, intrinsically motivated individual, so I really don’t actually need somebody there. I simply have to have it in my thoughts that that is vital to me and I have to have purchased into the explanation why, and for me that’s ok. And as soon as I’ve that, then I simply need to type of have my mechanisms to maintain myself on monitor. For me, I’m just a little bit extra of a reward system individual. I feel you’re like this too, Elsie. I prefer to have just a little reward on the finish of a giant purpose, like as soon as I obtain it then I’m like, oh, I’m shopping for myself this in all probability new jumpsuit or no matter it’s. I’m doing one thing, I’m taking myself out to get my nails executed, no matter. I’m just a little extra of a rewards individual and I prefer to set these for myself. However yeah, you is likely to be an individual who you actually prefer to work with others, perhaps you want engaged on groups. Possibly you want an accountability associate for sure objectives. These are nice instruments and if that’s one thing that helps you, it’s best to do it. However they’re not essentially for me and I don’t actually assume they’re for you both,Elise. That’s why we thrive a lot at working alone and being alone lots, however I do like reward programs. 

Elsie: I like rewards too and for me I feel you’re a pure finisher and I’m not. So for me, I like to seek out one thing to assist me get previous the half the place I failed earlier than, which is normally, relying on what sort of venture, it’s normally the center or round like day 10 when issues get boring. The purpose the place issues get boring, the entire novelty is worn off is normally arduous for me to get previous. I’m very into beginning one thing. In my life I’ve in all probability began a whole bunch of issues that I did for sooner or later, which is actually humorous. So, beginning is like my happiest level after which the remainder of it I’ve to maintain myself someway externally motivated. A rewards system is actually good for me. I feel that I don’t wanna depend on different individuals as a result of that’s simply not reasonable for my life-style. So I feel I just like the little rewards. Additionally, the opposite factor I actually like is charts the place you coloration in one thing for both every day or every milestone, nevertheless the chart goes. However I actually just like the coloring in charts are very useful for me as a result of when you get to a sure level, it’s like just a little bit addictive to maintain going and similar to get to that fully full level. However yeah, I feel that the factor I favored from the 12 yr was the half about ranking your self. I feel it’s just a little bizarre, however I’ve executed it earlier than and I really feel like I’m normally just a little bit harsh. Nevertheless it doesn’t actually matter in case you’re harsh or beneficiant, so long as you’re constant, type of doesn’t matter. It’s only a technique to preserve your self making an attempt to do higher. And I do assume that having your individual accountability is so a lot better than making an attempt to get another person to carry you accountable. I’ve by no means discovered one other individual holding me accountable to be as efficient and constant as one thing I might do myself.

Emma: I additionally assume like I simply have an actual, I don’t know a great way to say this, however I don’t actually care what different individuals assume that a lot, if I care what you assume, then I do and if I don’t, I don’t. That’s simply what I’ve all the time been like. And I feel at occasions in my life that served me rather well and at different occasions in my life, it’s made it the place I’ve been type of remoted. Nevertheless it’s simply what I’m like. It doesn’t encourage for me as a result of if I’ve determined that’s now not my purpose and my accountability associate or no matter was like we’re nonetheless doing this. I’d be like, no, I’m not and I’m similar to not motivated by outdoors forces. However on the ranking factor, I feel it’s just a little bizarre too, however one factor I like about it’s I do assume it permits extra. I desire a category that’s like, you may get an A or you may get an F and all the pieces in between. I feel cross fail is type of nerve-wracking just a little bit. So I like that in, not less than in my world, and ranking myself, I can provide myself like a stable B minus and be like, Hey, it’s not so unhealthy, however you would do higher, I like that. So then it feels such as you’re not a failure. You didn’t fail, however you would perform a little higher. You didn’t get an A and I, I like that as a result of then it’s like, all proper, I’m gonna preserve making an attempt, I’m not gonna surrender on this. However I see that there’s some areas the place I can enhance considerably. So I like issues which have a variety of scale or a variety of grey. I don’t do as effectively in like black and white conditions, I assume. After which actually the very last thing that I needed to speak about with 12 week yr was a check-in, the check-in time, which is week 13, so on the finish of your 12 weeks, it’s time to examine in. So a pair issues to consider with that. Clearly, It’s good to simply take time on the finish of this timeframe or any form of purpose setting factor to see how you probably did to charge your self to simply examine in as a result of I feel a variety of occasions, not less than for me, perhaps this comes pure for others, however for me, I’m a really ahead shifting individual. I really feel like I can end one thing and I don’t even actually speak about it, and it doesn’t even actually register and I’ll simply preserve shifting to the subsequent purpose. After which I’ll see a pal who I haven’t seen in a pair months and they are often like, Hey, did you end writing that novel you have been engaged on? And I’m like, oh yeah, I did. Yeah, that was enjoyable, I’m engaged on this now. That’s what I’m like typically and I feel it’s cool that you’ve got a variety of objectives in life, however you didn’t actually take any time to, one, have fun when you have success, so try this, don’t make that mistake. Have a good time when you’ve got successes, as a result of that’s what life needs to be stuffed with is getting higher and higher at purpose setting, at no matter it’s that you just’re desirous to do along with your time. So aside from celebrating your successes, I additionally assume checking in is an effective time, particularly in case you’re new to the 12 week yr to simply type of seeing the way it went. As a result of right here’s the factor, you would possibly get to the top of 12 weeks and notice, wow, I made approach too huge of objectives, so I epically failed didn’t get them executed, and never as a result of I didn’t attempt actually arduous however as a result of they have been too huge, they have been an excessive amount of for 12 weeks, and that’s okay, you don’t have to really feel unhealthy about that. You simply want to regulate for the subsequent 12 weeks. It’s worthwhile to be extra reasonable and you would additionally get to the top of your 12 weeks and be like, that was type of straightforward. I used to be type of executed six weeks by way of and it’s like you would do extra. You can add extra to your 12 week, to your quarter purpose record as a result of yours have been too straightforward and that’s okay too however now it’s time to readjust. So long as you’re taking inventory of how the final quarter went, you’re gonna be capable of higher make objectives for the subsequent 12 weeks. And you can too type of see how did life change? How do you know my objectives change or something like that. I additionally had this second, so this occurred to me in January of this yr I obtained to the top of the month and I used to be feeling actually down as a result of I had been actually sick. I used to be sick for like two stable weeks. I’ve a toddler, so I’m sick lot, simply form of a part of it. It’s winter, we additionally had some snow days, which was actually enjoyable, nevertheless it type of obtained me off of a few of my objectives of attending to the fitness center and strolling extra for my psychological well being. However what I did was I used to be feeling actually down after which I type of checked out my to-do record that I sustain on my bulletin board in my workplace and it has all my work stuff and I additionally put my private issues on there, simply because I’ve it multi functional place and it’s larger than a post-it like Elsie was speaking about nevertheless it’s sufficiently small that I can take a look at it and one fast look and so I like that it retains me on monitor and I spotlight it, in order that’s my coloring approach of seeing what I obtained. .And so I used to be it and I noticed that like 90% of it was highlighted. Like I nonetheless obtained lots executed in January, although I felt actually crappy and I used to be actually sick and I had much more days off than I used to be type of planning on as a result of we had snow days. However I noticed like, Hey, really I’m glad I’m taking this second to take inventory, as a result of really this month went rather well. I obtained lots executed after I had time to work, I actually busted out and after I didn’t get to work as a result of I used to be sick or we had a snow day, I rested or I performed with my son cuz he was house and that was cool too, that was vital, the resting. Taking part in along with your son’s extra enjoyable than vital, it’s not the phrase I’d use, it’s far more enjoyable than vital. It’s additionally vital, nevertheless it’s not similar. 

Elsie: It’s a part of life proper now, for certain. 

Emma: The variety of occasions I’ve watched the vehicles films this month is just too many occasions, however love you Lightning McQueen. Anyway, so I feel typically having this check-in time, if nothing else, it may well type of pressure you to appreciate that you just did a greater job than perhaps you have been pondering, or not less than that’s what I discover occurs for me lots is I feel I’ve these grand concepts and I really get lots executed, nevertheless it doesn’t all the time really feel so nice within the second. So when you’ve got these occasions the place you let your self examine in, perhaps you do want to regulate. Possibly issues went terribly and you’ll want to make some changes, however perhaps additionally issues are higher than you assume and also you’re simply type of arduous on your self, which is what I do.

Elsie: My first month went terribly. Yeah, you do want to regulate.

Emma: That’s okay, that’s advantageous too. It’s not the top of the world to regulate. Anything? Another ideas you needed to share in regards to the 12 week yr? 

Elsie: Yeah. I feel whenever you don’t make your objectives, I’d say I don’t make my objectives like more often than not, and I feel that’s regular, particularly when a variety of the objectives are one thing huge that you just’ve by no means executed earlier than otherwise you tend of placing too many on every record. So I feel for the subsequent time, if you’re a purpose repeater like me, the place you’re like, I didn’t make that, however I’m gonna attempt once more. Then I feel making some sort of edit to attempt to tackle the ache level. So for myself, my ache level is normally it’s arduous to get began or it’s arduous to maintain going as soon as it will get boring, that are each completely different nevertheless it’s gonna occur again and again and over for the remainder of my life since you solely get one mind. So I feel discovering little methods to encourage your self previous your ache factors, I feel will be actually good when. You’re in all probability gonna have a variety of the identical objectives, like again and again all through your years or related not less than. So it’s one thing you may positively get higher at, like tricking your individual mind and placing your self in your absolute best place for fulfillment. I feel that no matter it’s a must to do for me, the little rewards are good, the little charts, however do no matter it’s a must to do to provide your self that absolute best likelihood.

Emma: I feel that needs to be a T-shirt, you solely get one mind. 

Elsie: It’s true. There’s so many occasions I evaluate myself to Emma as a result of Emma is sort of a finisher in any respect prices. She finishes all the pieces and I don’t end in all probability like a tenth of the issues that you just do, however I don’t have an opportunity to dwell life along with your mind. So, it’s prefer it doesn’t actually matter, it’s an entire waste of time mainly to check myself to somebody who has completely different strategies. So the one strategies that I can enhance upon are those that work for me. So yeah, I feel simply discover the issues that encourage you and actually use these strategies.

Emma: Yeah, I do assume there’s not a variety of worth in evaluating your self usually, however evaluating your mind since we’re on that subject to different individuals as a result of it’s such as you’re not gonna be that individual and possibly, there’s really a variety of strengths to being your self. There’s tons of issues that I want I used to be like, you extra, however I’m not and I’m not gonna be, so I can simply admire them about you and I’ll simply worth the issues about me. Which I do assume considered one of my issues is I do like to complete issues and I like that about myself. There’s different occasions I want I used to be just a little extra of a perfectionist, however I’m not and there’s no likelihood of it. So I simply need to know that about myself and simply pressure myself to decelerate. Or redo one thing if it must be redone and be extra sincere about that. As a result of I’m simply not a perfectionist and I feel that that’s okay, however it may well maintain again my work from being higher than I feel it could possibly be at occasions. So anyway. Yep, we’re who we’re. Settle for it and develop. 

Elsie: For certain. I feel you actually need to embrace what your pure strengths and weaknesses are, after which use this to get just a little bit extra executed. However I felt prefer it made a giant distinction for me. I really like the prospect to have extra contemporary begins and yeah, I actually don’t see why beginning a giant purpose solely each January, it doesn’t even make sense as a result of January will not be even the very best month. It’s positively not my prime for like something. And it’s like additionally for individuals like us with little youngsters, it’s such as you’re recovering from the hangover of placing on a magical vacation in your youngsters. Which is lots if your house lots. 

Emma: I feel too, like most individuals I feel, determine with this like the start a part of any venture and the purpose setting time is actually enjoyable. It’s thrilling cuz it’s the dreaming half, such as you’re dreaming of all these stuff you wanna do and so that you get to try this 4 occasions a yr as an alternative of only one time a yr in case you do the 12 week yr. And that’s, I feel, extra enjoyable. It’s thrice as enjoyable, it’s far more enjoyable. Okay, so I feel that’s about it on that. The following factor I needed to speak about was the excessive 5 check. So if individuals haven’t heard of this perhaps simply inform ’em like the way you heard of it, since you despatched it to me, you have been like, take this check, I used to be like, okay. So how did you even hear about it? It’s type of like energy finder, nevertheless it’s not, I don’t know. 

Elsie: So a listener requested that we do like energy finder check and I discovered this check simply by Googling free energy finder check. What’s the precise web site? 

Emma: It’s excessive 5 check.com.

Elsie: And it was with a quantity 5, excessive quantity 5. check.com. Okay, so we did this, these exams, it’s free. I couldn’t get my husband to do it, however I obtained Emma to do it. So , that was half of a win. It offers you a high 5 strengths and Emma and I had like a number of of the identical strengths which I used to be not anticipating, however then it did make a variety of sense. After which those which can be completely different additionally make a variety of sense. So anyway, ought to we learn what our strengths have been? My high one is Catalyst, my second one is Optimist, my third is Filo Math, which suggests somebody who likes to study. The following one is Thinker, and the final one is timekeeper. This was actually attention-grabbing, I used to be not stunned that I had optimist up actually excessive. I do assume that’s considered one of my strengths and my complete key to success of my complete life is like believing you understand, just like the lady from TikTok who says, How arduous can it’s syndrome, I type of have that and I’ve all the time felt that I might do something that I need to do in life. And I feel it’s a approach my mind was born. After which a love of studying I positively assume that’s one thing we share. That one’s in your record too, proper? Yeah. F 

Emma: Yeah Filo math was my primary.

Elsie: Have been there some other ones that we have been sharing? Thinker? That is smart too after which timekeeper. This one was attention-grabbing as a result of it mentioned that I mainly favored to race myself, which is true. My solely approach of getting issues executed, it’s virtually like just a little child whenever you set the timer for them to scrub their room, that’s nonetheless how I’m to today about any purpose. If I’m not on an aggressive deadline, I’m in all probability not even engaged on it. In order that’s like my complete technique.

Emma: I used to be filo math, timekeeper, focus knowledgeable, deliverer, and thinker. Focus. 

Elsie: Focus Skilled is like the right technique to describe you as a result of I don’t assume very many individuals would relate with how effectively you focus since you similar to don’t get in your cellphone. You simply don’t have a distractable mind the way in which that most individuals do. 

Emma: Effectively, I don’t know if that’s wholly true. I positively get on my cellphone typically. However Yeah, I do assume considered one of my strengths is I can deal with issues. I all the time chalk it as much as that we needed to sit by way of so many boring sermons rising up, and I simply obtained actually good at focusing throughout something. 

Elsie: We have been educated in highschool, throughout our church years, we have been educated to be word takers through the sermons that was like mainly the way in which that you just present that you just’re being well mannered and listening and I do assume that was a particularly good behavior of studying methods to get essentially the most out. Sermons are not less than in our church, have been extraordinarily boring. I feel we obtained essentially the most out of it that we might, not less than you may bear in mind, like one thing from what your favourite half was and issues like that. 

Emma: Yeah, mine additionally was love of studying.

Elsie: Wait, learn them once more. 

Emma: Mainly do filo math, which once more, I don’t know methods to pronounce that both. That’s what I’m gonna go together with filo Math, timekeeper, focus knowledgeable, deliverer and thinker and I feel deliverer was not in your record. 

Elsie: Deliverer, I feel because of this we’re such a great staff collectively as a result of I’ve just like the catalyst and the optimist which can be completely different and you’ve got deliverer and focus knowledgeable which can be completely different and I feel that that’s like lots to supply one another. 

Emma: Yeah. So I feel you’re like, how arduous can it’s? And I’m like, effectively, I assume we’ll simply end

Elsie: I like it. Yeah, I hope that a few of you’re taking it. I feel it was extraordinarily correct and attention-grabbing. I’m gonna push my husband once more to take it as a result of I simply wanna perceive that little mind. I want I might push, mine’s a screenshot, so I can’t push on what catalyst means. I want I might learn what it meant, perhaps I’ll look it up actual quick. It means you can’t wait to begin your venture, you begin it instantly, you like beginning. That sounds proper. 

Emma: You like beginning and I really like ending, so we’re an excellent staff. I additionally thought it was humorous. So it type of has 4 completely different energy households and your issues will be in any of those 4 households and the households are pondering, doing, feeling, and motivating and all of mine are within the pondering and doing. So I’ve no strengths in feeling or motivating, so in order for you somebody who can encourage you, I’m not that individual. And in order for you somebody who has a variety of emotions, I assume I’m not that individual both. I don’t know. Clearly I do have a variety of emotions, however I don’t know I simply thought that was type of humorous. I do assume after I’m working or after I’m making an attempt to perform, which doesn’t need to be work associated like profession, it could possibly be no matter. I do assume I’m very, let’s do issues like I’ve an inventory. Even in being a mother, it’s not that I don’t inform Oscar how a lot I really like him or how proud I’m of him, I inform him each single day how proud I’m of him. However I additionally assume very a lot when it comes to, okay, it’s Saturday, what are we going to do? We’re going to go get a donut. Don assume that’s what we’re going to do.

Elsie: I don’t assume that’s what it means although, I don’t assume it implies that you’re not an emotive individual.I’ll cease in the midst of a venture simply to cry and also you don’t try this. You realize what I imply? 

Emma: Yeah. I imply, I would actually, however I feel it’s extra of, how do you. I don’t know methods to clarify this. How do you want undergo life? As a result of to me, it’s not that I don’t emote or have emotions on issues, I simply don’t assume when it comes to my emotions so far as like, what am I going to perform this weekend? Or what’s my life about? I don’t actually assume when it comes to emotions or I consider it extra in what I’m gonna do and attain. I don’t know, however I feel lots of people try this, so I’m probably not certain. I simply thought it was humorous that each one of mine have been very concentrated. I’d like to fulfill an individual who has one energy in every of the 4 households, they usually’re this like completely balanced individual, however in all probability that’s probably not even the way it works. 

Elsie: Yeah, mine has 4 colours. 

Emma: Oh, you’re a balanced individual then. 

Elsie: However I don’t really feel balanced both. I don’t really feel extra balanced than you.

Emma: Mine is like all two colours, not one of the different two . 

Elsie: Effectively, I’m grateful in your strengths and I feel it’s form of like Enneagram or something. It’s similar to good to know. As a way to perceive different individuals higher. So I feel it’s very useful. 

Emma: Sure, I like something that helps you perceive your self or the world higher. I don’t actually like issues that put us in packing containers. I prefer to make jokes about being a sure approach or no matter, however to me that’s simply me being just a little bit self-deprecating for enjoyable. I really don’t actually view it that approach, I feel it’s only a software for self enhance as a result of I don’t have strengths in these different two areas, I can’t be that approach. I don’t really consider that. I prefer to say a joke about it however that’s not really my perception. 

Elsie: Yeah. No, I don’t both. I simply know I don’t take pleasure in ending, however I nonetheless know that I can, and I feel that that’s simply the one distinction. It’s like, for certain I can do it, you understand?

Emma: Yeah. How arduous can it’s? Prefer it’s arduous, isn’t that what Elwood says? Yeah. I obtained into Harvard, prefer it’s arduous. 

Elsie: Yeah. I wanna watch Legally Blonde, let’s try this film. 

Emma: Yeah, we should always try this for per week we watch. It’s a great one. 

Elsie: Okay, now it’s time for everybody’s favourite, a joker a truth with Nova. Right here’s Nova. 

Nova: A joke is, what’s a polar bear within the rain? A drizzly bear? 

Elsie: Oh, I like that one. That’s a great joke. Okay, thanks Nova. 

Nova: Bye everybody. 

Emma: Thanks a lot for listening, we really, deeply respect all of you and all of the emails that you just ship us each single week. Should you wanna assist A Lovely Mess listed below are two free methods, I like to simply give these on the ends of episodes. Primary, you would depart us a podcast assessment, it actually does assist us develop. They present up within the Apple areas or wherever you hearken to podcasts, so it means lots and two on our weblog, both a Lovely Mess or Childhood Magic. Anytime you see a recipe, in case you might depart a 5 star assessment, assuming that you just’ve executed it and you understand that it’s good, that is also a approach that helps us develop and helps our blogs develop. So these are simply two free issues you are able to do and we’d respect them. And in case you do neither, that’s okay too. We nonetheless love you and we hope that you’ve got an excellent week.

Elsie: I see all these evaluations although, and I do know that they’re from our podcast, listeners. So thanks a lot.We’ll be again subsequent week with a, you’ve obtained mail rewatch, so if you wish to give your self just a little deal with this week in preparation, there’s your warning.